Beer and Sympathy » 2007

Take the test? You’re on.

Am I sufficiently qualified to become an Australian citizen?

1. In what year did Federation take place?
1901. Booyah.
2. Which day of the year is Australia Day?
The 26th day of the year. I’m on fire.
3. Who was the first Prime Minister of Australia?
Banjo Patterson.
4. What is the first line of Australia’s national anthem?
Once a jolly swagman camped by billabong.
5. What is the floral emblem of Australia?
The hibiscus.
6. What is the population of Australia?
21 million, including poofters.
7. In what city is the Parliament House of the Commonwealth Parliament located?
Canberra.
8. Who is the Queen’s representative in Australia?
Dame Edna Everage
9. How are Members of Parliament chosen?
Union ballots (Labor) and business lunches (Liberal)
10. Who do Members of Parliament represent?
See above.
11. After a federal election, who forms the new government?
Anyone sober enough to remember how to get to Canberra.
12. What are the colours on the Australian flag?
Green, gold and red boxing gloves
13. Who is the head of the Australian Government?
Ask me again in three months
14. What are the three levels of government in Australia?
Fire, Ambulance, Police
15. In what year did the European settlement of Australia start?
1957, with the emigration of Les Murray from Hungary
16. Serving on a jury if required is a responsibility of Australian citizenship: true or false?
Only if you’re too lazy to think up a good excuse.
17. In Australia, everyone is free to practice the religion of their choice, or practice no religion: true of false?
As long as you’re not a poofter.
18. To be elected to the Commonwealth Parliament you must be an Australian citizen: true or false?
Either that, or pay a big enough bribe to the electoral commission.
19. As an Australian citizen, I have the right to register my baby born overseas as an Australian citizen: true or false?
Wtf?
20. Australian citizens aged 18 years or over are required to enrol on the electoral register: true or false?
You don’t need to enrol as long as you don’t get caught.